EXERCISE

Hola, mi llamo Dr. Tushy.

Knickerbocking

Did you know that in the name of the NBA basketball franchise, the New York Knicks, "Knicks" is short for Knickerbocker?

I did.

But what is a Knickerbocker? It certainly is a funny word, but why is it, other than its nonsensical sounding collection of phonemes?

It probably comes from the earliest Dutch settlers to New York City in the late 1600's who adopted the name. It has been used more recently as a word to describe those short pants that baseball players used to wear, or any pant that is fitted tightly at the knee. Such as women's bloomers or knickers. Seriously.



Both of these gentlemen are named "Patrick".



All facts sourced from Wikipedia, this is good shit to use in your essay if you're doing one on Patrick Ewing, Pat Riley, Harmen Jansen van Wyhe or the New York Knicks.

Music Bloggin'

What's that? Raekwon is keeping it real on Staten like it was 1997? He invited Method Man in to drop a hook like it was a Limp Bizkit jam? Ghostface is upping the off kilterness now that Dirty is gone? Still keeping it muthafuckin' real for the 17 year old rap fan in all of us.

And thankfully, they haven't stopped with the, "oh shit, nigga, i been shot and I got cocaine all over me from this drug deal gone bad" fantasy bullshit made exclusively for teenage boys. Sweet.

Caption Contest

It's time again for the http://www.mutualjerkoff.blogspot.com caption contest!!
Storm your brain to come up with funny or entertainingly provocative captions to accompany this month's featured photo:



Please leave all funny or entertainingly provocative captions in the comments area below.

Dynasty

Naw man, forget the Redgraves, the Barrymores, the friggin' Baldwins (I said friggin'). Frig 'em. This right here is the world's greatest acting family, straight up:

IMPORTANT RAP ALBUM

I miss this album. I stole the CD from A&B Sound and pumped it daily for years, then lent it to someone, never got it back, now I can't remember who that someone is.

I miss this album.

Step to me and I'll suck yo dick!

Eazy Duz It

Didn't Dave Grohl roll with Eazy?

He wishes.

Digitally Remastered Punk

So, Sub Pop has reissued Nirvana's first album, Bleach, as a special edition, digitally remastered whatever.

Just so's everyone knows, this album, when it first came out, was my first taste of "I've got the real cool shit, no one's got this, it's so underground and therefore am I" music snobbery that has carried me over for just under 20 years. I got it much later than the really cool kids who had it before Nevermind, but I learned from them.

Bleach was a loud and abrasive punk fuck you album that prided itself on noisiness and static. I'm pretty sure when it first came out, it was only available on tape. Low quality, non-digitally mastered 1/4 inch tape. It was recorded by casual heroin users in a rat-infested studio in Seattle. Being rat-infested in Seattle is no easy feat. Bleach was meant to be played on a shitty two-speaker tape deck in high school art class (after school) or the skate park. Nevermind was polished corporate rock that assholes and homophobes listened to. Bleach was true skool.

You can't digitally remaster dirty shit. A homeless and smelly dude is still homeless and smelly, whether he's wearing his own shit-stained wet dog smelling sweat pants and ski jacket, or a brand new Boss suit. It's like going to the Mona Lisa and fixing up her smile.

It's stupid. I don't care really, Bleach was a pretty irritating record for me. For some reason, I really liked Incesticide (see the dawn of my music snobbery above).

I am a Wild Party

I fucked up. I didn't do Halloween this year. Mainly because I am not a child, and it is children who like to dress up as superheroes or French maids, not full grown adults who have jobs and responsibilities.

That being said, here is my costume for next year:

I'm gonna soak my clothes in booze (spirits) and let it mostly dry, then I'm gonna cover them in puke, cigarette butts and sweat. What am I? "I am a Wild Party" I'll respond.

Don't get it? Fuck you, fuckface.



Imagine liking this music. Loving this music. Like this shit comes on classic rock radio and you think, "fuck, this is the best fucking song, eh!". Imagine what your life would be like if that was the case. Fucking imagine.

Remember that young hip swinging couple that wanted to break the rules?

That was over a year ago. I think they've broken a few rules by now.



They ain't them.



They neither.